Rebellious Advice: Focus on the Two of You

Wedding preps can go crazy. Stop. Breathe. Hold hands and go back to what's important.

Sometimes, we get so wrapped up in the wedding process, the details, that we forget what's more important: the two of you. This entry is for you to see beyond all the hullabaloo and fluff and re-discover what you and your fiance is all about. Love. 

This photographer sums it up pretty much. Read on.

Wise words from a wedding photographer…

The wedding train has derailed.
Put down those mason jars, store away that vintage typewriter and fairy lights and sit down because you need to listen. This is an intervention. The whole wedding industry has gone detail bananas and we need to clear a few things up.
- You! Over there! Step away from the hay bales and the Vintage Navajo rugs and come over here. Sit! Down! No, you don’t have to put lavender on the plates, you need to wake up!
We’re getting lost in details. The whole wedding industry is drifting away from what weddings are about and we’re all part of the problem – bloggers, photographers, planners and vendors – all hypocrites feeding the detail beast.
Strip it back.
Peel the layers off.
And start again.
At the center of every wedding we have a girl. Who fell in love with a boy. Or a girl who fell in love with a girl. Or a boy who fell in l… you get my point.
The rest is fluff.
If you read magazines and wedding blogs today, you’d think it’s all about the dress, the decorations, invitations or a million other things.
It’s not.
It’s about celebrating love, a manifestation of commitment, a gathering of friends and family.
Because you’re in love.
But if you visit many of the blogs today, you’d think it’s about other things. Heck, there are even themed shoots with no people. As if candles and old LP players on a blanket in a clearing in a forest make a wedding. Just add people. And maybe a groom. Or actually don’t, the wedding is about the details, remember? Details, details, details.
Strip it back.
Peel the layers off.
And start again.
Weddings are about people, it’s about commitment and celebrating love. It’s about you. Build on that and everything else will follow.
I am a detail person, so it’s not that I don’t like details. I love details. Details, details, details. Love them. I honestly do. I’ve worked with some of the best planners in the business and they’ve styled weddings to perfection, made details stand out and it’s always been great, because they’ve built on the couples, starting with who they are. And I actually like shooting details. A lot.
When I was younger I used to record mix tapes and give to girls I liked.
Every detail was thought out, every letter, every scribble, every word on that tape had meaning. I love me some details. I grew up in a house with vintage bottles and mason jars everywhere. That and rocks collected from oceans and fields. So I get the jar and bottle thing, I truly do. Throw in some rocks and I’m there. But remember what the wedding is about, why you’re doing this, that’s all you really need. Don’t stress out about building a fairytale wedding, perfectly crafted, every detail borrowed from somewhere else.
Look away from the blogs and magazines.
And look within.
Why are you doing this? What does it mean to you? Do you really need all that…stuff? And if you want stuff, are you adding stuff that actually means something to you? What do you want to remember from your day? The cake, the flowers, the dress from Hoya de la Poopy?
Or do you want to focus on that moment between you two? The boy? Who fell in love with a girl?
Strip it back.
Peel the layers off.
And start again.

(via jonas peterson photography)

In the end, what's really important is two of you and what you want. May your wedding be the start of peeling off the layers and being able to just be. Good luck to all those doing their wedding preps.

Yours in beauty & love,


1 comment:

  1. this is a very nice glad i read it..oh well i read everything in here haha one of my fave site! xoxo

    i love wedding has lotsa details..but above everything am so excited to hear my fiance's vow! can't wait.

    Thanks for sharing, Mica :)

    - Camille