When the Going Gets Tough... ~ The Rebellious Brides

Are you feeling like you are a drowning bride? (Photo by Mark Mawson)

Dear Rebellious Brides,

Did you ever feel like you are about to give up? Like you don't want to push through with the wedding anymore? Not because you don't love the person but rather, because of all the stress---physically, emotionally, mentally, and even financially? It's so hard to juggle especially since I'm the only one mostly taking care of the details. I feel like I have so much to do but I have so much little time. I feel like I am drowning and I am being dragged even further with one meltdown after another. Please help me!

--Ms. Lost

Rebellious Bride Mica says:

We only had around six months for the wedding preps and despite the stress, we never even once thought of not pushing through. We'd joke around that we should just elope because of the gastos but in the end, we got a lot of help, everything fell into place and we had a wedding that we so love! :)

Read on to see Rebellious Bride Mica's advice!

FUN FUN LANG!

You are bigger than that stress. When a wedding becomes stressful, step back and look at the bigger picture. It's just a wedding, people. What's important is that you and your future husband know how to LAUGH IT OFF and whether any storm on your way to your big day. :)

Don't take things seriously! (Photo by Nelwin Uy)

Rebellious Bride Kai says:

Before I began with my wedding preps, I received a lot of advice from ex-brides to savor every moment you have of your wedding planning. And so I did. I savored every wedding prep moment, whistled a happy tune despite the problems, and looked to my groom for inspiration and help. Yes, there were bumps along the way but we decided to be creative in dealing with the challenges. Some of you will probably don't agree with me on how we dealt with our finances but it is what it is and I never regret doing the things we did just so that we can get by. A lot of people also won't agree with our "techniques" that we kept our wedding under wraps 'till the wedding day arrived--but it was just our own way of warding off nega vibes. I don't recommend that you do the things we've done but what I do recommend is for you to be creative in dealing with your stress and wedding dilemmas. There are different ways to skin a cat, there are detours that can be taken, there are new doors that can open, even if it seems more obscure, if it can help you alleviate stress, then go for it!

The Magic (The Secret)

As an advice, I'd like to share this exercise that I recently just read in the book The Magic by Rhonda Byrne (author of The Secret and The Power). She says if you are currently experiencing a problem, write down 10 THINGS you can be THANKFUL for because of that problem. For example: Your wedding problem is your wedding budget and it's about to be depleted and you don't know how to recover. Say THANK YOU because you learned to be more resourceful because of your budget constraints, THANK YOU because you are planning the wedding of your dreams while others haven't even found Mr. Right yet. THANK YOU because you and your groom are learning a valuable lesson in life and marriage, THANK YOU because the finish line is almost there and better to have depleted the budget this far long instead of midway into the wedding preps. THANK YOU for even having the budget for the wedding--even if it wasn't enough, at least there was a budget to begin with, THANK YOU because family/relatives contributed to our wedding fund they are so generous and we are so grateful (other couples aren't even fortunate enough to have been given monetary donations from family so there is MUCH to be grateful for), the list can go on and on. Rhonda Byrne also says that at the end of your affirmations, say: THANK YOU, THANK YOU, THANK YOU! Rhonda Bryne says that this exercise doesn't only remind you to have a grateful heart, but it helps you keep things in perspective and should make you feel so much better.

Do you have your own POSITIVE advice for our Ms. Lost reader? Comment away :)

XOXO,
Kai & Mica
*follow us on Twitter! @RebelliousBride

2 comments

2 comments:

RachelMarch 30, 2012 at 3:44 PM
To Ms. Lost - My advice to you is to change the way you look at things. To be frank here, you sound like you think of your wedding preparations as a job that needs to be done. Think of it as a fun process and you will shift your feelings instantly. Sure you are the only one working on your wedding (haven't we all?) but it is your wedding after all. Believer me you are complaining now but you will miss it and regret it that you thought of it as a stressful stage. Good luck!
AnonymousApril 3, 2012 at 3:48 AM
Ms. Lost I'm sure you are not the only one who feels this way whether brides to be admit it or not. But just like what was beautifully said here try to count everything you can be thankful for. I felt the same at some point, until my soon to be and I sat down over Mexican beer, and tried to find humor on all our wedding dillemas! :) my good friend also told me after my rants that she'd kille to be on my shoes.. It's easier (and a real blessing) to plan you I do's w/ mr. Right than to dream endlessly of finding him. :) cheer up! :)